One-night stands are a pretty common sexcapade that people experience at one time or another. Or a lot more often than that. Let’s take a break from all the mushy perfect love stories and hear about the strange and messy times people banged one out and moved on with their lives.
Not me but my best friend in college had been speaking to this girl on Tinder and they eventually met up one night. One thing led to another and they ended up back at hers. They started going at it when suddenly the girl ran out of the room and started being violently sick in the bathroom. Turned out she hadn’t been feeling well all day. My friend put her to bed, got her a glass of water etc, asked the girl if she wanted him to stay – she said no – and then he left.To get out of her student flat he had to exit through the kitchen. He ran into the girl’s roommate, who my friend had met previously. They started chatting in the kitchen and then start having sex, turns out the girl’s roommate also fancied the pants off my pal. As they were just getting into it though the girl asked them to stop then she ran to the bathroom to also be violently sick. Turns out both roommates had food poisoning from their dinner the night before.
-GingerThunder96
I’ve not had one that was that crazy but when my mate lost his virginity he actually tore his frenulum, there was blood everywhere and the girl didn’t know what to do so just offered him a cup of tea.
He’s the only guy I know who bled on his first time, poor bastard.
-Invictusvictus
Visited my cousin at his university and we go out to a few bars and a club. Not sure how it happened but we become separated and my phone dies so I have no way of contacting him or a ride back to his apartment.
I buy some chicken noodles and slowly make my way in the direction I think his apartment is. Not sure how this happens either but I manage to get somebody to call me an Uber back to his apartment, only to find out its locked. I am able to get inside to the lobby area but not the actual hallway where his apartment is.
It’s around 4am at this point. Some RA looking weirdos are in this computer lab-type room typing up reports or something odd. I beg them to unlock the door and they get angry and say they are calling the cops on me so I run back out to the lobby praying that someone is there or that the door has become magically unlocked.”
There’s a girl now in the hallway. She’s walking away from the door. I frantically knock on the door hoping she’s heard me. She turns around. I breathe a sigh of relief as she’s walking towards me. As we are walking back down the hallway together I realize that I’m locked out of my cousin’s apartment.
When I get to his door I know his drunk ass is not going to answer and I still can’t call him cause of my dead phone. I notice that the girl who let me in is his neighbor. We make eye contact. She asks if I can’t get in. I say I can’t get in. She asks if I want to stay with her. I say I want to stay with her. I proceed to do the dirty with her while her cousin, who was actually visiting her, is sleeping in the other room.
I wake up the next morning, say hi to her cousin, walk next door to my cousins apartment (which is now unlocked), and finish my chicken noodles. Wild stuff, my cousin was baffled and so was I.
-junglecat6
Went to a buddy’s wedding, held in our mutual hometown of 12k people. Bride was in an optometry program and had a number of friends from the program in attendance. At the reception, I proceed to tie one on (they had a margarita bar and kegs, so it was that kind of affair) and hit it off with one of the bride’s optometry friends.
Our group decides to depart and hit the town, which constituted going to the towney bar down the street and drinking until we were plowed. I talk the girl into walking up the hill to my parents’ (who were at the wedding/reception) house, stopping for multiple gross makeouts along the way.
We get there and do our thing in my childhood bed, and I promptly pass out. I wake up in the morning, vaguely recalling some of the previous night’s events and am totally shocked to see this girl in my bed, situated just down the hall from my parents’ bedroom.
My stirring wakes her and she takes one look at me and says, “You’re gonna have to sneak me out of here, aren’t you?” I replied, “Yeah.”
She was totally cool with it. I went out and took the lay of the land. My parents were already up and in the kitchen, but I had an avenue to get her out unseen and took my shot. She was on it and we made it out clean. I took her to breakfast and found her a ride home, because it was way further than I was going to drive and I had a buddy heading that way. My parents didn’t find out for years, and it was way too late for them to be pissed when they finally did.
Always appreciated that girl’s effort.
-Cracklinwheat
When I was 17 years old, my school went on a class trip for a week to another country. We would just go to museums, events, do some sports-related activities and etc. during the day. Although we weren’t “technically” allowed to drink, the drinking age was 16 and teachers would pretend to not notice if we had a few beers. There was a girl that I kept making eye contact with most of the trip, and on the last day of the trip, the final planned event was having dinner at an old restaurant.
The girl ended up sitting next to me. We kept ordering drinks and started getting drunk, including the teachers. Keep in mind, this school was in Germany and having a beer or two with teachers is considered pretty normal, especially for Gymnasium. The girl and I started playing footsie and talking and eventually she held my hand and my dick got super hard. I was horny, drunk, and asked her if she wants to go to the bathroom with me. I told her I’ll go in first, then in a few minutes if no ones in there she should come in the men’s bathroom.
A few minutes pass and she walked in, we went into a stall and just started doing the dirty in any way we could given the small space and disgusting toilet in our way. About 10 minutes into our sexual endeavour, one of the teachers walked into the bathroom and knocked on the stall and asked if I’m ok since I’ve been gone for so long. I told him I’m fine, just having a stomach ache. The girl started giggling, and I’m 110% sure he knew she was in there. He says “ok, we’re leaving soon” and walked out. We put our clothes back on, I walked out, 30 seconds later she walked out, we sat back at the table like nothing happened.
-thrway239841282
She came over in the morning, we fucked, she made me watch the first episode of gossip girls, I fell asleep for 6 hours, when I woke up she was still sitting in the same position.
Her phone died while I was asleep and she didn’t bring her charger, so she sat there doing absolutely nothing for however long.
I had to have my grandma call me so I could tell her I had to leave. She offered to stay at my house while I was at my grandmas. I did not know her at all.
-Live_Ore_Die
Oh geez. Met this girl at a bar and got her to come back to my place. Things were going well and everything was cool. Did the deed. Went to sleep. Woke up the next morning she was gone which is cool. Right on. But my bed was SOAKED. Like damn it was wet. And I was thinking “man I knew I did okay but I didn’t lay some pipe THAT good did I?” So I got up and leaned over to smell it, “YEP, that’s piss.” This girl wet my bed like A LOT. I was pretty pissed (ha!)
So I go back to the bar a couple days later with my buddy who’s a regular there and told him the story and he says to me “oh yeah, she’s a regular too and she’s done that quite a few times and has a reputation now. We call her Water Gun.
Jesus Christ.
-heavyfellow
Was running a pirate convention (cosplay, ren faire types, artists and musicians, etc) and met a guy. We clicked right away and I hung out with him and his friends into the wee hours of the morning singing pirate songs and drinking. Ended up telling him he could plunder my booty. Had raunchy and wonderful sexcapades in my corset and wench skirts. Spent the night with him in his hotel room. Went to lunch with him and his friends the next day. Found out he was only there because his friends dragged him to try and cure his depression because he was in the middle of a divorce. Ended up really enjoying himself (and me). We kept in touch for awhile. I still hear from him every few years by email. He’s remarried now. I’m married, too. But it was a fun romp.
-andherewestand
After our make out session in the living room, we decide to take this into the bedroom, I the idiot that I am picks her up throws her on the bed and her head lands on the edge of the bed. She was unconscious for like 10 sec and I see a massive amount of blood rolling down the back of her head. I immediately took her to the hospital. Luckily, she did not hate me. We ended up having sex a couple of weeks later!
-Frienszone101
When I was in college I got a phone call from this girl I occasionally hung out with. She was in my college town with some friends, and said they had a hotel room with three girls but there were only two guys, and would I like to come over?
I did.
-refreshing_username
Late to the party but here it goes, I was celebrating my 25th bday and went out, met a cute guy and went back to his place, when we were on our way he explains me that he lives with his mom so I’ll have to be quiet…I was like wtf, ok, whatever I’m already here, in another city far from everywhere, so went into the house, very quiet and we did the deed, next morning I’m like ok, I need to leave cause my parents are waiting for me for bday lunch (I lived 2 hours away in another city) so I planned my escape and when I’m coming down the stairs his mom is there and says hi, long story short I ended up having breakfast with her, told her it was my bday so she made some really good eggs and toasts for me and we were having really nice conversation when I told her I needed to leave and I had no idea how, and she explained me everything, super cool mom! Never saw the guy again but I’ll never forget that bday celebration.
-pamlock
I hooked up with this girl who talked about her sister all the time while we were doing it. Apparently her sister’s ex who she slept with after they broke up had the weirdest dick she had ever seen. Also her sister pissed some dude’s bed on a one night stand. She was crazy hot though.
-fueledbyhugs
Got that beat. Basically same set up. My buddy goes home with girl, realizes the Uber is going to his parents house- boom, she was renting his room out from his parents while he was gone. He had to sneak out of his own house the next morning.
-dangerousbob
About a week after I got dumped, I posted a shirtless picture on a r4r subreddit and a girl in my city was interested. We exchanged pictures and arranged a drinking date.
Met for drinks, seemed to like each other fine, agreed to go to her place. On the way there, she stopped at a pharmacy and bought lube.
Went upstairs to her condo. We start fooling around. Clothing comes off and we start fucking. A few minutes in, she gets up and says, “you know what I love about one night stands? I don’t have to be someone I’m not. I’m going to go do some drugs, do you want some drugs?
Proceeds to bump coke off her kitchen table. We fuck again. She threatens to kill me twice throughout as dirty talk.
Walk home in a daze. Pretty confused about life and feeling soul drained. Buy a burrito. Bump into a friend I hadn’t seen in almost ten years who’d apparently moved next door.
Weird night.
-TOProMale
It wasn’t supposed to be a one night stand.
We had worked together for roughly a year and he spent the entire time thinking I was a lesbian (to be fair, he was half right). He finds out from a his roommate/our boss that I’m not and he asks for my number. We flirty text for a while, I’m really digging this dude. He finally asks me to meet him and some friends for New Years Eve. We meet up, get completely shitfaced and spend the whole night all over each other. We go back to his place. We proceed to break the bed frame and forget that his windows are open, so the entire neighborhood heard everything. In the process of breaking the bed, I had fallen and bruises the entire left side of my hip/back/leg/butt.
But we can’t tell anyone at work (No dating policy). So we decide to keep it under wraps. We keep talking, keep texting, things seem great. I move into a new place and we talk about christening the apartment. Then Friday comes along and he leaves for lunch and never comes back. Our coworkers are calling the hospitals and police departments. This isn’t like him. Or so we thought.
He turns up over 2 days later, knocking on his roommates door at 3am, explaining that he spent his entire paycheck and bank account on strippers and coke. He is promptly shipped off the rehab in New York. He calls me from the airport to apologize and swears I’ll be the first person he calls in 90 days. That was January of 2009. Never did get that phone call, but I did recently see him on Facebook and he looks happy (and clean), so I’m happy for him.
-AdamDawn
One time my friend John and I drove a couple hours to Boston for an old friends birthday party that we hadn’t seen in awhile. It starts as a house party and after that sort of dies down we decided to go hit some bars. I hit it off with a girl, so we broke off from the group and stayed the night at her place. Next morning I wake up, get dressed, and head out into the kitchen. I almost shit a fuckin brick because who is sitting at the table? Fuckin John. We, completely unknown to each other, went home with girls who happened to be roommates.
-choadspanker
When I was an 18 year old virgin, I worked at a store in a shopping mall. There was a car insurance place a few doors down from our store, and there was a woman that worked there that was about 28 years old, and a solid 10/10. She had this real sexy librarian thing going (glasses, hair always in a ponytail, or braided pigtails).
I joked with my buddies a few times that I should ask her out. One day she was in our store and after chatting a while, she made a comment about it being a while since the last time she got laid, and she made it somewhat clear that I had a shot.
I decided I was going to do something I never thought I had the balls to do. During closing time I went over to her store and asked her straight up:
“Me: “Got any plans after work?”
Her: “Nope”
Me: “Wanna fuck?”
Her: “Yes I do””
I have no recollection of how good it was (it was my first time, so I was just happy to get my dick sucked). The next morning, she asks me if I could drive her 9 year old kid to school. Most awkward drive of my life.”
A few days later, she is in the mall shopping, and brings her kid by my store to say hi. I didn’t know how to deal with this. It seemed like I trapped myself. The next day I told her that I didn’t feel mature enough for her, and I didn’t want to continue seeing her.
I was pretty close to chickening out from that conversation, and just quitting my job and disappearing.
-FinestTreesInDa7Seas
Girl from Tinder hits me up at 3:30 am and asks to come over. Obviously a booty call, I gave her my address.
She comes in with a huge ass duffel bag that has WoW characters all over it. I thought it was pretty dope… until she pulled actual dope out of it and proceeded to shoot up on my couch.
She spent the next 45 minutes picking at her face in my mirror and throwing up in my bathroom. I told her she had to leave.
-MeditationMax
Asked this group of people for a lighter at a strip club. This girl in the group (not a stripper) comes out to smoke with me. Im wasted drunk. Next thing i know we are making out and we end up fucking in the janitors closet with the door slightly open. This one stripper saw us go at it and just closed the door.
-ceyeyayo
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News Pictures Crazy one-night stands that were one-night sh*tshows
You don’t have to pack away your bikini just because you’re the wrong side of 20. These body-beautiful stars reveal their secrets to staying in shape and prove you can smoulder in a two-piece, whatever your age. Read on and be bikini inspired!
TEENS
Hayden Panettiere
Size: 8
Age: 18
Height: 5ft 1in
Weight: 8st
To achieve her kick-ass figure, Hayden – who plays cheerleader Claire Bennet in Heroes – follows the ‘quartering’ rule. She eats only a quarter of the food on her plate, then waits 20 minutes before deciding whether she needs to eat again.
Hayden says: “I don’t have a model’s body, but I’m not one of those crazy girls who thinks that they’re fat. I’m OK with what I have.”
Nicollette says: “I don’t like diets – I see it, I eat it! I believe in eating healthily with lots of protein, vegetables and carbs to give you energy.”
kim cattrall
Size: 10-12
Age: 52
Height: 5ft 8in
Weight: 9st 4lb
SATC star Kim swears by gym sessions with Russian kettle bells (traditional cast-iron weights) and the South Beach Diet to give her the body she wants. To avoid overeating, Kim has a radical diet trick – squirting lemon juice on her leftovers – so she won’t carry on picking.
Kim says: “I am no super-thin Hollywood actress. I am built for men who like women to look like women.”
https://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2018/12/crazy-one-night-stands-20.gif?w=500
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