I deeply sympathize with teachers. It’s not quite a thankless job, but it’s damn close, and almost every time I hear a story about someone’s “horrible teacher” story, I can’t help but be a little skeptical that maybe they were just a shitty kid.
But these teachers are just full of shit, so don’t worry about feeling bad as we tread through some of the dumbest stuff teachers tried to teach their kids that was blatantly false.
Computer teacher told us if you use “cut” on an image on a website that it will be removed from the website and will upset the website maker, so be sure to use “copy”.
Raven_of_Blades
The teacher put materials from plants and materials from animals on a board. We could not convince her that wool was not a plant.
Pedantichrist
My grade 6 teacher told me that “fatigued” was in fact not a word when I used it in a short story and insisted that I looked in the dictionary. Found it in the dictionary in about 2 minutes and proved her wrong in front of the whole class.
aesthetic-pixies
7 billion people died in WWII, 200 million Russians included.
deathman1651
That a Big Mac from McDonalds overwhelms your stomach with so much of everything that it doesn’t register you’ve eaten anything and that’s why you get hungry again so quickly after.
jamb0wise
That dogs evolved longer faces so they could smell things around corners…
Firefly128
You don’t need to know about periods yet because you aren’t 16. I was 12 and had had them for a year.
theaverageslut
While teaching Japanese history, my teacher was entirely convinced that the suicide of a Japanese Samurai was called sudoku, instead of seppuku
tunisianite
“Sodomize” instead of “cauterize” the wound.
Cla22ic
We were playing a game where you had to name a thing beginning with each letter of the alphabet
I said Orangutan for O and my cookery teacher stopped and shouted NO NO ORANGUTAN IS WRONG IT STARTS WITH AN A HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO A ZOO AND SEEN ONE?
She wouldn’t let me prove it and i lost the game because of it. Its been 7 years and i still cant forget it.
MVP_Bradsta
I had a teacher that swore that Harriet Tubman and “the Underground Railroad” was a physical railroad that ran under the ground!
BlitheringEediot
One of my first teachers told the class that the sea is blue because it’s a reflection of the sky. That same teacher, later in the year, told the same class that the sky was blue because it was a reflection of the sea. We lived on land; the sky should be green or brown; the sea, being only a reflection of a reflection, should be copying that green or brown. I pointed this out, began to present the correct answer, and was promptly sent out of the room for “being disruptive”.
taneth
“If you have sex before marriage then you will die soon after”
“If you have anal sex then you will turn gay”
“If you jump up and down after sex, then it will kill the sperm and you can’t get pregnant”
Just a few of the top tips I got told in HS
G42K
I’ll start. A teacher of mine told us that the left side of your body your feminine side, the right side is your masculine side. That’s why your skin is better on your left, your right is stronger, etc.
God what the hell?
6456290
Don’t know if that counts but we had the police come to our class and warn us of the dangers of drugs.
They told us some people inject cannabis with a syringe. Doesn’t matter how good the rest of the presentation was, they’ve lost all credibility with that and probably did more harm than good with that talk
WilhelmWrobel
“Meteorologist study the science of meteorites”
Evergladeleaf
Science teacher, during the sex ed portion of the year, said all penises are the same size “when it counts” (i.e. when erect). Classmate then asked why boobs can be different sizes, but the penis is the same for all men. Teacher them said she didn’t know and that would be a question she would ask St.Peter when arriving at the pearly gates.
I have a feeling the science teacher never saw more than one erect penis.
talonz1523
h/t Reddit
https://textbacklinkexchanges.com/teacher-teacher-what-the-fk-are-you-talking-about-18-gifs/
News Pictures Teacher teacher, what the f**k are you talking about? (18 GIFs)
You don’t have to pack away your bikini just because you’re the wrong side of 20. These body-beautiful stars reveal their secrets to staying in shape and prove you can smoulder in a two-piece, whatever your age. Read on and be bikini inspired!
TEENS
Hayden Panettiere
Size: 8
Age: 18
Height: 5ft 1in
Weight: 8st
To achieve her kick-ass figure, Hayden – who plays cheerleader Claire Bennet in Heroes – follows the ‘quartering’ rule. She eats only a quarter of the food on her plate, then waits 20 minutes before deciding whether she needs to eat again.
Hayden says: “I don’t have a model’s body, but I’m not one of those crazy girls who thinks that they’re fat. I’m OK with what I have.”
Nicollette says: “I don’t like diets – I see it, I eat it! I believe in eating healthily with lots of protein, vegetables and carbs to give you energy.”
kim cattrall
Size: 10-12
Age: 52
Height: 5ft 8in
Weight: 9st 4lb
SATC star Kim swears by gym sessions with Russian kettle bells (traditional cast-iron weights) and the South Beach Diet to give her the body she wants. To avoid overeating, Kim has a radical diet trick – squirting lemon juice on her leftovers – so she won’t carry on picking.
Kim says: “I am no super-thin Hollywood actress. I am built for men who like women to look like women.”
https://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2018/12/TWrong1.gif?w=371
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